KORY STAMPER: You say, “I write dictionaries,” and people go, “Oh!” and then they immediately tell you all the words they hate. And ‘moist’ is always at the top of the list. “Oh, I hate moist. It's so gross.” And like, if you wanna go find the studies that have been written on why people don't like the combination of sounds that result in the word moist, you can; but I just think sometimes moist is the word you need to use. And so just to be petty, I would just make it a more prominent word.
Read moreAllusionist 215. Two-Letter Words transcript
This is the Allusionist, in which I, Helen Zaltzman, cheat on my own four-letter word season thanks to this suggestion from listener Erica: “Perhaps an idea for a bonus ep of a four-letter word season would be one on two-letter words: there’s an established list that Scrabble nerds end up memorizing, and it’s full of weirdness. For example: aa, oe, and mm are all acceptable words. But ew is not.”
Spoiler, ‘ew’ is now! It was added to the Scrabble dictionary in 2018. So, enjoy that.
Read moreAllusionist 121 No Title transcript
About to go onstage to perform No Title for the first time, at SF Sketchfest 2019 at the Brava Theatre in San Francisco. Photo by Martin Austwick.
The bank clerk scrolls down and down this list of titles and honorifics, this enormous list of different ways to present ourselves, and I just want an option that doesn’t reflect my marital status, because why did all the available male titles not reflect marital status whereas female ones did? And come to think of it, why do titles reflect gender anyway? Why does anything reflect gender? What is the point of gender?
I was asking a question I am not intelligent enough to answer. And I wasn’t expecting this moment, in the bank, on a seemingly trivial and pointless mission, to be my introduction to gender studies and queer theory, but you don’t necessarily get to choose the learning moments of your life.
And in case you’re sitting there thinking, “Well. If if it’s SO important to you to have a title that does not reflect your marital status or your gender, why don’t you just become a rabbi?” Well, my family lapsed HARD. None of us is becoming a rabbi. We’d never make it. They can see the bacon in our eyes.
Read moreAllusionist 118 Survival: Bequest transcript
ELIZABETH KEREKERE: I'm so convinced that transphobia, biphobia, homophobia are such an integral part of colonisation, I reject that as a colonial construct, I reject it as racist.
As they took our land - tried to take all of our land, tried to take all of our language and suppress our culture, they also took our expressions of sexuality and gender. And that is important to us in a core part of our culture, especially because the way that the institutional racism, the intergenerational trauma that is the legacy of colonisation has impacted on us and the levels of discrimination against people with diverse genders, sexualities and sex characteristics, that we see that all of this, all of this was a massive attempt to cover up what was already there and pretend it never happened.
Allusionist 100. The Hundredth - transcript
Today there’ll be a celebratory parade of language-related facts that you’ve learned from the Allusionist and I’ve learned from making the Allusionist, so some old facts, some new facts - well, the new facts aren’t recently invented facts, they are established facts, just making their Allusionist debut.
Read moreAllusionist 20: Baby Talk - transcript
[baby voice] Wook at your widdle face. Who’s a cutie pie? Who’s a cutie pie? Here comes the aeroplane - [cough] [/baby voice]
When you’re talking to a baby, it’s hard to maintain dignity. In fact even the baby, who can’t talk, thinks jigsaws are for eating, and is probably sitting in its own effluvium, is more dignified than you at that point.
But, good news! All those stupid voices, and banal rhetorical questions, are helping the baby to learn language.
Read more